Steamed Up

The idiot just left. First time calling my customer "idiot".

This young lady came in looking for makeup. She told me she wanted to look good and wanted only the good makeup, never mind about the money. So tested the foundation, then the lipstick, then the eyeliner, and etc etc etc. Oh yes, she even decided to wear fake eyelashes. Well, after the make over, she completely looked dazzling. 

Ok, then she told me: Aiya, I think I only get the eyelashes, will do already lar.

As she walked out from my shop, I heard her talking over the phone: "I am done with the makeup, where can I meet you?"

This really made me all steamed up. Wasted an hour of my time and fooled me to do a free makeup for her. The next time she visit again, I will made her look like a clown. Damn it!!!

Do you work here?

I was serving a customer when the BreadStory supervisor came in to the shop. She walked towards my staff, and looked into her eyes.

Breadstory Supervisor: Do you work here? (maybe her voice was low, it frighten us)
Staff: er....yes (she answered trembly)

Breadstory Supervisor: Do you know XXXX?

Staff: er....yes

My girl was stunned then she answered trembly again. Her face was pale. I was stoned.

Gosh....what had happened? Did my girl did something very wrong? Did she offend her and the staff?

Breadstory Supervisor: XXXX wants me to pass you the breads.

She turned around and walked off.

Huh.....I thought my girl had offended the auntie. In fact, it was the little chick who has no gut to come forward to know this young lass in my shop. Really chicken! And the way the auntie'd asked my girl really scared me to death.

Any Comment?

A woman was looking at the perfume while her kids were running around the shop.

I noticed one of them went to the counter and started playing on the keyboard. When I told the kid to leave the counter, the mother said: "Jangan lah sombong, main pun tak boleh ke?" (Can't the kid play for awhile?")

Excuse me, that's the cashier's counter.

What type of mother is she? Any comment?

Foundation Stories

Chinese FairLady: Do you sell foundation?

Me: Yes, let me help you choose the color.

Chinese FairLady: I want purple color.

Me: ------- (no comment)

Black Woman: I am looking for foundation.

Me: Sorry, we don't have the suitable color for you, Mam.

Black Woman: Why?

What should I say to her ler?

My Customer is a Queen

There are many types of customers, some are nice and friendly, some are arrogant and hostile.

But this customer is rather different. Not only she is moody, but also she is damn "complicated".

1st Requirement - Exact Ingredients
You need to tell her exactly the key ingredients of the product she is interested.
It took me 2 hours to explain the overall skin care to her and list down all the key ingredients of the products she was keen. Trust me, she really researches on the info, and will purchase if she finds the info is right plus the price is the cheapest in the market.

2nd Requirement - Snacks
You need to serve her snacks. Fill up her stomach, make her feel like she is the "premier" customer. Now I always keep some candies or biscuits in the drawer.

3rd Requirement - Smiles smiles and smiles
She always come in with a black faced and tells you so and so from which shop was rude to her, and blar blar blar. You need to comfort her and speak to her very softly and wear your smile all the time. Depending on her mood, she might blow you up, but keep cool and be cool to her. Coz she told me she loves to make complaints.

Hard to Made Decision

A well-dressed woman came in to look for eye shadow brush.

Woman: How much is this?
Me: RM1.95.
Woman: Is hard for me to made decision.
Me: Mam, is only RM1.95.
Woman: Ya, I know. But is hard to made decision.
Me:

Oh, this one I have already.

My staff just gave me an eye signal she'd gave up on this "nice auntie". Because I told them before, if there is any difficult customer and I am available, I shall handle.

Me: Can I help you?
Woman: What is this?
Me: (I explain the product.)
Woman: Oh....this one I have already.
Woman: What is this?
Me: (I explain the product.)
Woman: Oh....this one I have already.

........

This curious "auntie" checked and asked on almost everything, from hair care, nail care, body care to skin care. And every time she would say: This one I have already. So, I told myself, time's up!

Me: Mam, do you open a shop like SHINS? You have all the things in our shop.

Bosses are coming to Mines

You better watch out!

Better not put the bunting out!

Better not eat at your kiosk!

I'm telling you why,

Bosses are coming to Mines.




The Management is making a list
and checking it twice.
They are going to find out where's dirty and clean.
Bosses are coming to Mines.

Sweeping and mopping the whole morning.
Checking the lighting every corner.
They know which are faulty and need to be changed.
So change them for goodness sake!


With little tin horns and little toy drums,
rootie-toot-toots and rum-a-tum tums.
Bosses are coming to Mines.

Managers who toddle and coo,
Executives, Guards and Cleaners too.
Bosses are coming to Mines.

Testers

Early in the Monday morning, a Chinese sloppy woman walked into the shop.

Woman: I come to collect foundation.
Me: Pardon me?

The woman then passed me a newspaper cutting. It was one of the past  promotions, it read "....redeem your sample today on April 4, 2010 (valid for only 1 day)......)

Me: Sorry madam. The promotion was over.

Then the woman passed me another piece of redeemption. Again, was passed.
And I told her the same. She handed me another and I repeat.

Woman: Can you not give me a tester?
Me: No
Woman: Can you show me your testers?
Me: What are you interested? Testers are for product testing not give away.
Woman: Please lar, give me some testers. I want some testers.
Me: Sorry, please leave.

What a lousy start of the week.

Headache Shampoo

Man: Do you have XXXX shampoo here?

Me: No. Would you like to try another brand?

Man: OK

Me: What type of hair type is yours? Is it for oily or dry hair?

Man: For headache. I have headache.

Me: Headache?

Man: Yes, I mean headache. "Sakit kepala", you know?

Me:^%*&!#~

Common Phrases

Quite a number of my customers are from the Middle East, either they are tourists or students. However most, if not all, speak very little English. Often we have to use sign language to get the message across.

The common phrases from them are:

1. "How much?"

2. "Discount?"

3. "Expensive, expensive"

4. "Thank you. I will come back"

5. "You close what time?"

Shop Bully

Almost seven in the evening, not even a single sale transaction.

I was anxious and worried. Suddenly the little frogie door chime said: "Hello, welcome"

A middle-aged woman walked in with an elderly woman and a small girl. They carried some bags, mostly are food stuff. I could see there were at least 2 plastic bags contain styrofoam food boxes from Esquire Kitchen.

Woman: I want some perfume, nice ones. Price is not important.

Me: We have plenty. What types of scent do you like?

Woman: I want for display only.

While she talked, she took out an old Dior miniature out from her bag and asked me to smell. I rejected politely. Yet she forced me into it, but I avoided. That made her became hostile.

Woman: Why so scared? You think I will poison you ah? You smell, smell, smell....(She was very agitated)

I'd told her off politely. After a few rounds of testing and smelling, she decided on 3 little bottles of perfume. Well, they are the cheapest. She wanted branded perfume, but only willing to pay not more than RM20 each. Was doubtful she knew the price for the perfumes. Sigh....

Then she continued to walk around the shop. As she walked passed the mirror, she asked if there were any skin care I may suggest to help lighten her pigmentation on her face. So I suggested some products. Before she could decide on the product, her mischievous daughter was playing the hair serum on the shelf. We could hear the glass bottle tapping with one another. And before I knew, she started lecturing her daughter. She cursed and yelled at the little girl.

I sighed when seeing such nasty situation, the elderly woman told me quitely they were exhausted because of the day shopping. And before I knew her lecture with the daughter finished, she was behind me. As I turned back, she stared at me fierecely.

Woman: Let me warn you. You don't cheat me. I am fierce, you know, I will whack you. You hear me? Now I want samples. I buy perfumes and I buy skin care, I buy so many things. I want samples.
Me: (Quiet)
Woman: Don't tell me no samples, I will whack you. Now give me samples!
...................

Goodness, what is happening here?

I realised the locals are very fond of using violence, and are very demanding. Are these the common cultures here? Anyway I know this place is notorious for gangster for all time. So, maybe she belongs to one of the local clans, who knows.

Gaga Attacks

Is a quiet afternoon, not many shoppers in the mall. Maybe because of the heavy rain.
Suddenly, 2 girls walk passed. Am shocked to see such girls dressed in skimpy outfit during the day in such a family mall! Am widely awake. Are they trying to impersonate someone like Lady Gaga?

What's really going on here?

Tattered fishnet stockings, butt-crack baring jeans, itsy-bitsy teeny weeny shirt, and undies, looking sexy is all about, well, sex! Quite disturbing if you ask me. But like it or not, that is what it is. 

Don't these people have brains that what designers create on the runways are meant for the catwalk. They all look oh-so-luxe on the catwalk but they are wildly inappropriate in real life. Sigh......


Someone told me later these "girls" are not really girls, but transgenders.

Hair Gum

A china-man uncle came in to look for hair gum, and I showed him Fudge Hair Gum.

Man: Eeee..., like gel lar. I want hair gum.

Me: Well, this is definitely hair gum. Hair gum is gel type.

Man: Eeee.....I don't want this. Anything else?

Then, I showed him hair wax and clay for styling. Yet, he still answer: Eeee......

I tried to explain the products with the styling to him, and he kept: eeeeeee...

Finally, I got his message. He was looking for hair gum to glue back the hair that were trimmed.

Huh....I have no clue where he can find the gum he wanted.

Customers Customers Customers

After more than a year of running the retail business, I now have a better understanding of dealing with customers. There are all sort of them, especially the difficult ones. And the plain rude customers are many and they come in a wide variety. Again, I am not very certain if it is due to the location of the store.

There are those whose personality rubs you the wrong way. They may not be difficult for someone else, but they are for you. And then there are those who are difficult for everyone, such as picky, know-it-alls, egocentrics, fault-finders, samples collectors, insane, etc. I believe every promoter who works in the mall here can easily list a number of the types. Perhaps one day I may start writing stories about them.